In our next Emotional Intelligence (EI) Friday blog series, we will examine loneliness by considering research on social isolation in the workplace. We will discuss who is affected, the psychological effects of prolonged loneliness, and how you can support yourself or others who may need your help. We hope you enjoy this three-part series.
Click here to read Part 1 of this series.
Click here to read Part 2 of this series.
So, what should you do if you are experiencing loneliness? Being aware of the dangers of prolonged loneliness is a starter. Below, we have also compiled suggestions for keeping loneliness at bay, for yourself or within your workplace or network.
Take cues from your loneliness. If you feel lonely at work or in your personal life, act on the emotional prompt! Do not ignore the feeling or focus on work to the detriment of your own professional, social, and physical well-being. Consider how you can find more consistent person-to-person interaction. If you work remotely or travel frequently, think about facilitating work discussions over video conference or the phone rather than relying on email or instant messaging.
Form personal relationships. While you’re at work, speak to people and don’t allow yourself to rely solely on emails or other technology to communicate. Ask people about their lives outside work and tell them about yours. Leave your desk to have lunch and invite someone to walk and/or eat with you. Take the occasional coffee break with peers. Join office committees or participate in community service activities. In the Work Connectivity survey, almost three-fourths of Gen Z and just under 70 percent of Millennials say that they would be more inclined to stay with their company if they had more friends. As a manager working to staunch loneliness on your team, Barsade and Ozcelik warn against falling into inauthentic means of relationship-building such as holiday parties or company picnics. Relationships are built in small groups by people sharing about their lives. Large parties often result in people feeling more isolated as they witness the socially connected enjoying the event.
Find shared meaning. According to a Harvard Business Review study, finding shared meaning with colleagues—understanding the meaning that they derive from the work and connecting it with the meaning that you find in the work—creates meaningful “social cohesion” and insulates team members from feeling isolated. This also addresses Barsade and Ozcelik’s point about the meaning and identity that younger generations are looking for in their careers. Younger generations are seeking to be part of something bigger, not just to receive a paycheck. This may also provide a way to connect with others when there are not obvious shared interests or a foundation for a relationship.
Work for companies and managers who take their emotional culture seriously. Some companies have cultures that are more prone to driving isolation than others. Consider this as you look for jobs. Do the employees seem connected beyond meeting corporate goals? Do they seem to know and care for each other on a more personal level? “Mandy O’Neill (management professor, George Mason University) and I have done some work in emotional culture—the norms around what emotions you’re allowed to express at work and what you’re better off suppressing. We found that in emotional cultures of companionate love [that include] care, compassion, and tenderness, even lonely employees were more likely to be perceived as approachable and committed to the organization… Anything that a manager can do in terms of creating a culture that sends out cues that are supportive is helpful,” Barsade said. When interviewing, look for signs that your manager and co-workers will be interested in forming real relationships with you that extend beyond your work together.